"Birthday Blues"

Today is my birthday, and mixed feelings of happiness and sorrow wash over me. This feeling of sorrow has nothing to do with aging and the years going by. And, it has nothing to do with not having accomplished my goals for the past year—because I have.

It has to do with bittersweet memories of happy moments gone forever—of blissful times with beloved ones who’ve passed away and will never wish me a happy birthday again or be here with me to celebrate.

They will always be remembered for their unconditional love, encouragement, kindness, and wisdom, and will live in my heart forever. Thinking of them and our happy moments together brings a smile to my face.

There were sad moments and turbulent times, as well. But, we faced those moments holding hands, and giving strength to each other. I know they will always be there for me—watching over me like angels from heaven. However, their physical absence leaves a huge void that can never be filled.

And, it seems that this hollow feeling gets worse on my birthday. Why? I don’t know. Maybe, it’s the fact that every year I move further and further away from those happy times.

I feel down and lonely, but then, my little boy brings me some flowers to wish me a happy birthday, and I feel happy again. Life moves on, and whether we want it or not, we move along with it…